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Tomorrow I will be a mom to a 4 year 5 monther, a two year old and a 12 week old baby. I am in awe of how I got here, how I handle or not handle it, and what my life has become.

I am really happy with my life, I want to do a better job of living in the moment. I see time passing so quickly, how is Noelle 12 weeks already? I am putting away 0-3 month clothes that she is to long for. I am reflecting on the fact that I am lucky enough to have had another baby to wear these clothes, but sad that this might be the last time I see my baby wear them.
I am busy taking in Dallas's language, he will say anything you ask him to, and it is so stinking adorable. I know soon he will be able to pronounce the words more correctly and I fear I will forget the adorable way he says "mini loader" or "skid steer".
And quite honestly I spend quite a bit of my day negotiating Dallas and Emily. I dwell on the precious moments where they play wonderfully together, and make up some new activity that causes them both to giggle. But many times it is breaking up quarrels, how does Em know already that repeating everything her brother says will annoy him so? They fight over the same silly toy when they are blessed with so many toys that go unplayed with. And they hit, each other all the time!

I have these grand plans for how our day should go, all the activities I want to do with them, and then the daily house stuff. I get irritated that I mean for us to leave the house at 9:30 and we arrive some place at 10:15, because we can't find a hat, or we want to wear a spring jacket not a winter coat. I should relish in these fits that occur daily, but instead it annoys me, that I am a bad parent for letting it happen, that we will be late, that I don't have the patience in the moment to be helpful and redirect a kid throwing a tantrum and instead I lose my cool! My goal for this month is to live in the moment, really enjoy these blessings I have. As my friend Jen's blog says... The Days are long, but the Years are short